I haven’t blogged in a very long time but I’m back and hopefully better. Quarantine has given me the opportunity to start blogging with no excuses. It has taken me so long to get back into the blogging and I guess its because I was scared to put myself out there again, but I had to remind myself how much I enjoy writing.
Self doubt and lack of confidence was something that I had long struggled with, not just in my personal life but work life. I was always insecure about my body and self worth, which is one the reasons why I started gym. As I grew older, I literally felt more self conscious than before especially when I entered into relationships. It was a slow gradual process to get the level of self confidence that I have today, mainly due to reading of God’s word, my peers and filtering the thoughts of comparison within myself.
Through this journey, I realised that you should never be afraid to remove/adjust/ delete things to help your self growth, because in the end the only thing that matters is health. Mental health is key as it can also affect your physical and vice versa. In this present climate it’s important to look after both, as its Corona season can be testing, but remember ‘Tough times never last’.
When it comes to self growth, If I’m going to be honest you have to be a little selfish and firm in what you feed your mind. Some argue for the fake it till you make it, which honestly I have applied in various scenarios, but it has only proven to be a temporary solution.
The plain truth for me is that my faith with God has gotten me so far in my confidence and in realising my worth. I know who I am in Christ and as a person, when I came to this realisation I felt more confident to be myself and my confidence grew. It wasn’t necessarily a cocky sense of seeing that I’m better than someone, but that I am loved beyond my mistakes and just the way I am. I do not need to prove to God that I am worthy of love, he does not care for outward beauty but where my heart is placed and what flows from that and when you understand this yourself it is a game changer. There is moments when doubts and thoughts creep in, but the main thing I constantly have to tell myself is that I am made in God’s image. Clearly I am how God intended me to be, as we all know he makes no mistakes.
I know it may be hard to understand for non-religious individuals, but I guess also being comfortable in my own space is vital. One thing I recommend is exploring different places by yourself, such as cinema, cafes and restaurants and developing comfortability in your own company. Remember there’s only one you.
Its been Real,
Rue




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