Real with Rue

I have not had a year like 2025 since 2021. I have been through the wringer in every area of my life, from my health, work, and law school to friendships, faith, and relationships. There was not a single area untouched by 2025. However, like a Nollywood movie after much witchcraft and demonic promotion, to God be the glory, because I am alive.

It sounds strange to say, but I think I suffered well. That may confuse some people, so let me explain. Suffering is promised in the Bible. It is a natural part of the human experience, and Christians are no different. If anything, it is harder. Christ promises suffering just as He suffered on the cross.

The difference between my suffering in 2021 and in 2025 comes down to maturity. Looking back, I see that while some of the catalysts for my pain may not have been necessary, the way I handled things back then only prolonged it. In 2021, my pain led me to things that grieved the Holy Spirit, because I was trying to use a band-aid to fix a bullet wound that only God could heal. Yet even then, the Holy Spirit stayed with me, even when I did not want Him to.

In 2025, deep sigh, in the midst of suffering, I remembered who God is. He is omnipotent, consistent, and He has good plans for me. Having seen His hand in previous years and His comfort in earlier moments, I used that evidence, even through worry and nervousness, as proof that God always comes through. All He asks for is a mustard seed of faith.

It is vital to remind yourself of God’s track record in your life, and I was quick to do so. As Peter says in 1 Peter 5:8, the enemy is prowling, and the mind is the first place he attacks.

When things go wrong, my mind is quick to excuse sin, to justify it because of circumstances. But grace does not work that way, and I cannot abuse it. That mindset becomes entitlement and undermines what Jesus did on the cross. The mind is powerful, and when I faced my situation, remembering the truth of who God is brought peace and calm. This must be continual, because our minds forget quickly.

How did I suffer well? I kept going. I looked forward and reminded myself that this too shall pass. When I needed to wallow, I did, but I did so before my Father in heaven and with friends who encouraged me in the Lord. Suffering well is not about pretending to feel positive. It is about what you do with the pain and how you respond.

I will never forget when my exam stopped working, then I found out I had failed, and shortly after, my training contract was deferred by a year. I cried. I was angry. But I was supported by people who spoke life into me, and I returned to the feet of Jesus, trusting that He was in it with me and would work it out according to His will. Let me be honest, that delay sent me into a spiral, where I was screaming and shouting to gospel in a field. But one hour after speaking to my friend Mary, who poured biblical truth into me, I danced to “Praise” by Elevation Worship with bloodshot eyes, because in all circumstances, we give thanks.

I believe God will give me a break in 2026. Some things are already set and bring certainty, but even so, I am still trusting and praying. This year reminded me that we can make plans, but the Lord determines our steps. I had even planned my ex-partner’s birthday for 2026, AND paid deposits.

It has been real.

Rue

*Thank you for all the support this year, the comments and messages of encouragement. I truly appreciate it. May the Lord of heaven and earth bless you, keep you, and guide you. Whatever storms come, may He keep you above water and safely under His wings.