Real with Rue

You had one job:

There’s a story in the bible when God decides to destroy the city of Sodom and Gomorrah for wickedness. However, he decides to save a man named ‘Lot’ and his family for being faithful, on one condition, as they are leaving they are not allowed to look back. Lot’s wife, looks back and turns to a pile of salt. Weirdly, there are remarkable women in the bible, but God reminds us to remember Lot’s wife. Lately, that story has really been on my mind, because I realised a part of me lives in the hope of the past.

Power of choice:

A lot of life is a choice to react based on circumstances thrown at you, and when emotions are involved it can be much harder. But that’s the thing, you have to consciously choose to move forward, each day I have to force myself to look forward, even saying it out loud. All you can do with the past is take the lessons from it, but not dwell on it. I used to believe that you should always keep talking about something and let it out, but now I believe that choosing to forget and move forward has more benefits than consistently bringing it to your mind. I still agree you need to let it out, but also give yourself a healthy but strict time frame to stop reminiscing.

The mind is a powerful thing, because of choice you have the power to also distort reality from that situation. For example, Lot’s wife looked back because she remembered what she thought was an amazing and comfortable life, despite being in a wicked city. A bad but comfortable past can often hold us back from a brighter but unknown future, but again you have to choose to want better for yourself.

How to continue to move forward:

I recommend writing down why you are leaving the past, and writing down what you actually want. When you can see things visually you are able to digest them and process better, but you have to be honest with yourself, and for me, I realised when I was 19 that I did not respect myself enough to believe I deserved better. When I feel like looking back, I look at my journal notes and remind myself this is not what I want, and with time my self- respect to leave toxic situations became easier because I forced myself to have delusional faith to believe I deserve better, till I actually believed it.

Its been real,

Rue.